Today's news in brief:
It is with much sadness that The news in brief has to announce the tragic and untimely loss of the Summary Squirrel.
He was so overcome with grief and disappointment about the death of The World’s Greatest Movie Villain Alan Rickman that he journeyed into the Underworld, waded across the River Styx and booted the Grim Reaper square in the nuts.
Square. In the fucking nuts.
Of course there's no coming back from that, but it needed doing and he goddamned got the job done. Because although he was a hard-drinking, foul-mouthed, belligerent arsehole, he was a bad ass mother fucker and he knew how to take care of business.
Whilst not everyone can wade through rivers of lost souls and kick metaphorical representations of universal constants square in the motherfucking nuts, everyone can do something about cancer which is a terrible disease that rips families apart.
You can help your family make more responsible lifestyle choices.
You can give money to Cancer Research UK
You can donate your old stuff to a cancer-related charity shop. If you have Transformers to give away and live in South Tyneside we totally encourage this...
You can host a MacMillan Cancer Care coffee morning and raise a bit of cash for the wonderful people who help care for families who are affected by this asshole disease.
You can even write a blog post spurring people to action. It's not slacktivism so long as you back it up.
Back to normal service on Sunday.
Reading the news so you don't have to…
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