The news in brief:
Self-righteous newspaper is a dirty little hypocrite
Concert goes a bit wrong
Mad suggestion that all people are people
Cows make terrible customers
Economy still pretty shit
Kung Fu toddler cheers up the Internet
Hunters become the hunted
Religion’s bodycount continues to mount
Space is fucking awesome
Man’s inhumanity to man continues apace
Newspaper rolls out fluff piece from 1994
Product placement still not news
Pro tip: shooting unarmed kids is not okay
Flat pack attack
Study states the obvious: sleep is good for you
Free washing machine with every indoctrination!
Hippos are terrible people
Bad news: bacon is bad for you
Newspaper misrepresents how refunds work
Indistinct smear probably not a Martian ghost
Out-of-focus purple blob probably not aliens
Nudes in brief: Melanie Sykes
Diana Watch 2015: photographs for sale. Still dead.
And finally: space lettuce is totally a thing now
Reading the news so you
don’t have to…
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