The news in brief:
Supermarket makes sensible decision
Fracking is still a thing
Scotland wants to have its cake and eat it
Celebrity panellist suggests: You've got to hold and give, but do it at the right time. You can be slow or fast, but you must get to the line.
Family tragedy is somehow our business
CBB: there's cock and balls everywhere!
Study states the obvious
People fucking love swearing
Small child has corrective surgery
Celebrity panellist suggests: They'll always hit you and hurt you, defend and attack; there's only one way to beat them: get round the back
American baffled by NHS
Diana Watch 2014: 'still dead'
Studies identifies convenient scapegoat for lack of self-restraint
Outrage: businesses advertise their products IN STORE!
Shock: Restaurant has seats!
Celebrity panellist suggests:
Catch me if you can, 'cause I'm the England man and what you're looking at
is the master plan
Grieving family's non-objective feelings presented as fact
Religion's bodycount continues to mount
Celebrity panellist suggests: We ain't no hooligans, this ain't a football song; three lions on my chest
I know we can't go wrong
Man's inhumanity to man continues apace
News website changes it's headline after commentators call them out on their shit
Everyone in Newcastle knows the offside rule
Reading the news so you don't have to...
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