The news in brief:
Bright spot probably not aliens
News outlet finds kitten picture we’ve all seen already
Woman not so hot at budgeting
Family will sue anybody
Mad suggestion that the rules should apply to everyone
equally
Man’s inhumanity to man continues apace
Happy Potter fans literally wet their pants with excitement
It’s not always time to take a selfie…
Basically, everyone in the UK is being investigated by project
Yewtree
Rubbish museum probably hasn’t even seen Star Wars
Religion’s bodycount continues to mount
Gaza
situation escalates from ‘hairy’ to ‘pretty fucking hairy’
Sports: Germany
beats the shit out of Brazil
Nudes in brief: Venus Williams
Drugs are bad – especially if you’re a ferry boat
New rules curb my freedoms because some fucking, scratty
little cunts can’t behave themselves…
Cycling will give you cancer
Man goes to newspaper over minor inconvenience
Diana Watch 2014: ‘still’ dead
Reading the news so
you don’t have to…
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