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Monday 9 February 2015

The news in brief 9th February 2014

The news in brief:

Roombas have started the robot uprising – Skynet unavailable for comment

Crazy world leader not so hot on history

Economy prepares to batter the human race all over again

Public transport a bit shit 

Medieval mindset struggles with the whole 'gays are people' thing

Judge thinks he's above the law

Coincidently, we found an old copy of the Magna Carta if you need a few pointers...

Adverts are not news

Man’s inhumanity to man continues apace

Women suggest that they may in fact own their own bodies…

Slow news day? Don’t worry – just wheel out a story from last year

Pot calls kettle black

Study states the obvious: people find attractiveness attractive

Don’t be a prink on the Internet

Frankenonion makes life marginally better

Pro tip: lions are fucking dangerous

Religion’s bodycount continues to mount

Stop the press: man and woman carry their own fucking bags

It turns out old people can be cunts too

Is your TV trying to steal your bank details? – Skynet unavailable for comment

“The charge of witchcraft was read out by a cleric…” atheists everywhere dumbfounded

Nudes in brief: Bleona Qereti

And finally: miracle mum gives birth to twins 

Reading the news so you don’t have to…

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