Today’s news in brief:
2016 claims another TV legend
Man's inhumanity to man continues apace
Cat coppers are totally a thing now, whatever next?
Dog pilots. That's what.
Woman really hates car
Car really hates woman
Woman wastes police time
Religion's bodycount continues to mount
Little girl is smarter than you
Man not wizard after all
Bile-spewing hate-engine sets back equality by 5 million years
Mad suggestion that everyone should have the same rights
Breaking news: people are free to wear whatever the fuck they want
Indistinct blurr probably not a ghost
Despicable cunt-whistle gets what he deserves
Genes will kill us all
Weather set to get less wintery over next three months
Study states the obvious: being punched in the head is bad for you
Nudes in brief: Courteney Stodden
And finally: newspaper digs up meme from like, 1915…
Reading the news so you don’t have to...
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