image

Thursday 24 March 2016

The news in brief 24th March 2016

Today’s news in brief:

Within the space of two hours, the same newspaper shared two conflicting stories: one saying you should totally skip breakfast fatty, the other saying breakfast is the most important meal of the day (but eat two little ones instead of one big one.)

We take this as conclusive proof that you can prove anything with statistics and you shouldn't pay attention to anything you read. Especially on the Internet.

If you don't hear from us again, it's because we died from eating nothing but coffee and deep-fried cheesecake for breakfast.

In other news:

Europe still feeling pretty ropey

Bigots take to the Internet in droves

Politicians use tragedy to try and score points

Religion's bodycount continues to mount

Retired man has zero shits to give

Virtual donkey causes virtual chaos

Missing boat shows up

Nazi hate-engine gives Skynet a run for its money

Man's inhumanity continues apace

Asshole gets what he deserves

Bard loses his head

Nudes in brief: Alessandro Ambrosio

And finally: man has incredible hangover

Reading the news so you don’t have to...

No comments:

Post a Comment