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Thursday 11 December 2014

The news in brief 11th December 2014



The news in brief:

First flurry of snowfall sees United Kingdom grind to a stop

Weatherbomb blasts the North West

December’s weather normal for time of year

US navy unveils its mother-fucking death ray

Knee-jerk commentators don’t really understand economics  

Religion’s bodycount continues to mount

‘Orange Wednesdays’ are now just ‘Wednesdays’

Royal does quite get how humans work

Study states the obvious: during economic downturn things became more expensive

Pro tip: stop fucking about on railway lines

Man’s inhumanity to man continues apace

BBC to build Cumberbatch a Cumberpatch

Apparently it’s time to make some babies

Man’s inhumanity to horse continues apace

Just so you know, stringing lots of clever-sounding words together does make them a sentence

So, beard baubles are a thing now

Rumours about crazy dictatorship surprise no-one

Advert suggests Christmas is about some dude called Jesus?!

Hamper is pretty fucking expensive

Random knot-hole maybe looks a tiny bit like the Virgin Mary

Nudes in brief: Ellie Goulding

And finally: crows invade town

Reading the news so you don’t have to…

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