image

Monday 21 December 2015

The news in brief 21st December 2015

In the spirit of the season it's The news in brief Nativity special:

Bureaucracy: 1, Common sense: 0

Bethlehem pretty fucking crowded

Study states the obvious: more people should have filled out the census online

Iron age public transport terrible

Virgin pregnancy not at all suspicious

Husband ‘totally cool with it’

Motel trade booming

Economy still pretty shit

Religion's bodycount starts to salivate in anticipation

Political leader plans a bit of infanticide

Really bright star spotted in sky

Daily Mail says starlight causes cancer

Three Asians walk a really fucking long way

Wise men rubbish at buying gifts for children

Shepherds wish they'd heard of Twitter

Breaking news: not everyone is an asshole

Housing crisis sees migrants sleeping in cattle sheds

Donkey unhappy at always being portrayed by worst actor

The Guardian, despite not being printed for nearly 2000 years, somehow makes it about Diana

Nudes in brief: Kim Kardashian (probably)

And finally: a baby is born

Reading the news so you don't have to…

No comments:

Post a Comment