The news in brief:
Religion's bodycount continues to mount
Xenomorph spotted on Church
Christians miss the point
Celebrity chef talks sense
Ancient city found in Himalayas
Children are shits
It's okay to run people over if you're young and successful
Another teacher caught canoodling with pupil
Boy plays cricket
Subtitles are a bit shit
UN suggests US should probably wait for their report
Scientology is fucking weird
Robot carers might be a thing
Dad upset that his daughter was a bit slutty
Pregnant woman goes outside
Reading the news so you don't have to....
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