The news in brief:
Religion's bodycount continues to mount
HS2 will save us all
Woman wears skirt
Scapegoat sacrificed
Study proves what we already know
HS2 will kill us all
Free child care not free
Man goes shirtless
Media glamorises Supervillain
24 year olds 'still children'
100-year-old drivers
Giant mouse!
Thoroughly decent bloke
Woman has figure
Old person gets pacemaker
Sinister clown still at large
Veils hide faces
Couples to have sex
Man clicks favourite button by mistake
Disabled people have to wait their turn
X Factor contestants cry
Diana Watch, day 15: 'still dead.'
Big business unveils product
Reading the news so you don't have to...
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