The news in brief:
Shock: liking a status on Facebook doesn’t cure cancer…
…but once a year some ladies on the Internet decide that
the way to battle cancer is to put up an embarrassing Facebook status to
confound and confuse the boys. Shhhhh, don’t tell!
And every year one of my network of super secret girl
friends gets the email and copies me in and I ruin it for everyone.
This year it seems to be gender neutral, which I suppose is
a step in the right direction, but it still doesn’t do jack shit.
‘Cos you see, you can’t cure cancer by typing anything on
Facebook if it’s not followed up by action, and you can’t raise awareness by deliberately
confusing or confounding other members of the donating, fund raising, caring,
sharing, helping, population.
Go run a race, or shake a bucket, or donate some clothes to
a charity shop, or sit in a bath of goddamned baked beans, but for the love of
whatever gods you believe in, don’t be an armchair slacktivist.
This years rules in full:
QUOTE "You shouldn't have liked or
commented! Now you have to pick one from these below and post it to your
status. This is THE 2014 BREAST & PROSTATE CANCER AWARENESS game. Don't be
a spoil sport, pick your poison from one of these and change your status, 1)
Damn my balls are sweaty 2) Just used my boobs to get out of a speeding ticket
3) Anyone have a tampon, I'm out? 4) How do you get rid of foot fungus? 5) Why
is nobody around when I'm horny? 6) No toilet paper, goodbye socks. 7) Someone
has offered me a job as a condom tester, but I'm hesitant. 8 )I think I'm in
love with someone, what should I do? 9) I've decided to stop wearing underwear.
10) It's confirmed, I'm going to be a Mummy / Daddy! 11) just won £900 on a scratch
card 12) I love my big bouncy boobies. 13) i swing my balls back and forth. 14)
that wasn't a fart, new pants please. Post with no explanations So sorry I fell
for it too!!!!! Looking forward to your post Shhhhh!!"
In other news:
Sweden
shows the world how to police
America
shows the world how not to police
Religion’s bodycount continues to mount
Israeli couple show that love really is stronger than hate. Nice
one.
Man’s inhumanity to man continues apace
Minor customer service error represented as news
Strange lights in sky probably not aliens
Invasion of the giant spider
Nudes in brief: Ola Jordan
Health and fucking safety strikes again
Actors have sense of humour
Diana Watch 2014: after bright sun and torrential rain, memorial
garden understandably overgrown. Still dead.
And finally… giant swastikas make houses harder to sell
Reading the news so
you don’t have it…
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