The news in brief:
Attack of the two-headed dolphin!
GP surgery not so keen on free speech
Popcorn will kill us all!
Tinned tomatoes will kill us all!
Artificial sweetner will kill us all!
White chocolate will kill us all!
Pea shoots will kill us all!
Bread will kill us all!
Swordfish will kill us all!
Sweetcorn will kill us all!
Food colouring will kill us all!
Basically don’t eat anything
Science is fucking awesome
Religion’s bodycount continues to mount
Trains are fucking dangerous and family is very, very lucky
Study states the obvious: tickets bought at different times
and from different websites may not cost the same…
Man’s inhumanity to man continues apace
Mad suggestion that a woman’s body is her own doesn’t go
down so well
Pro-tip: parcels don’t go on the roof
Christmas presents from people who don’t really know you set
to get worse
‘Free health care’ not really that hard a concept
Stop the press: relationships work better when you like each
other
Doctors are not psychic
An ebola vaccine would be pretty sweet about now
Nudes in brief: Dita Von Teese
And finally… now you can buy your cat a Kim Jong Un scratching
post
Reading the news so
you don’t have to…
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