The news in brief 1st July 2014

The news in brief:

Hand model has surprisingly pretty face

Exclusive: human beings are twats

Woman being comfortable in her skin SHOULD NOT BE NEWS!

Daniel Radcliffe is not actually Harry Potter

Man quite good at tennis

Man’s inhumanity to man continues apace

Medieval morality has left baby disabled

Singer clearly doesn’t understand how Twitter works

Article suggests that if don’t like Facebook, you don’t actually have to use it

Man proves that not all human beings are irredeemable pricks

Religion’s bodycount continues to mount

People continue to murder each other in invisible sky wizard’s name

High Street store restores grumpy news pundit’s faith in humanity   

Man basically writes his own P45

Breaking news: hot drinks are hot  

Thing is, I’d sue McDonalds if the hot chocolate was cold…

Mad suggestion that everyone has to play by the same rules

Boy genius is smarter than you

Police a bit heavy-handed

Study states the obvious: contraceptive pills stop you getting pregnant

Nudes in brief: Kendall Jenner

Pro tip: whales are really big

Diana Watch 2014: ‘still’ dead

Reading the news so you don’t have to…