The news in brief 13th July 2014

The news in brief celebrity special:

Newspaper dictates what kind of body type you want

Woman wears clothing appropriate for swimming – whilst swimming

Fuck the gig that’s coming up – the stylist’s wearing a bikini  

Nudes in brief: Liam Payne

Paparazzi intrudes on romantic night out

‘Discreet’ and ‘Private’ obviously mean something else to some people

Photographer intrudes of family holiday

Outrage: couple caught shopping

Woman wears dress

Newspaper approves of woman’s clothes

Woman changers her hair colour

Singer conforms to media’s narrow definition of beauty

Woman updates social media

Celebrity has the audacity to go out without make-up

Actress tries to escape paparazzi attention – sadly she failed

Newspaper struggles for similes

Newspaper doesn’t approve of woman’s clothes

Scandal: Consenting adult enjoys legal activity

Woman proud owner of legs

Shock: woman wears the same dress more than once!

Singer sits down – outside!

Model dares to look a bit tired after a long flight

Diana Watch 2014: still pretty dead

Reading the ‘news’ so you don’t have to…