The news in brief:
Study suggests that rising house prices means houses cost
more
Experimental drug will save us all
Nurse wins at gallows’ humour
North
Korea apparently not all doom and gloom
Wild speculation
Lion’s inhumanity to crocodiles continues apace
Pro tip: if you think a woman is your property – you’re a
dick
Turn out men can be parents too
Man’s inhumanity to man continues apace
Man quits job
People still harping on about Top Gear
Religion’s bodycount continues to mount
We’re going to have some weather
Shopping basket-fu!
Ironic jet fighters are ironic
Racist cupcakes
Robot ants will replace us all
Science is fucking awesome: Google working on robot surgeons
Study states the obvious: lower your expectations to find
love
Thief is unbelievable thundercunt
Stop the press: long-running television drama to come to an
end
Economy still pretty shit
Big expensive house will be big and expensive
Nudes in brief: Charlotte Crosby
And finally: we pasteurise milk for a goddamned reason
Reading the news so
you don’t have to…
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