The news in brief:
Man not wearing gorilla costume
Facts have literally spoiled a good story
New police car designed by five-year-old
Dying teenager demonstrates that not all humans are ignorant, bile-spewing hate-mongers
Hysteria: air pollution causes autism
Giant flying squirrel discovered
Study states the obvious: sheep are not goats
World leader a bit sexist
Religion’s bodycount continues to mount
US looking for software that can identify irony
Turns out London is a JCB graveyard
Man struggles to throw ball
Man’s inhumanity to man shows no sign of stopping
Necronomicon found in Harvard University library
Animal abuse is neither funny or entertaining
Terrible human being forgets how to person
Man is ignorant, bile-spewing hate-monger
Minister tries to bribe the Scottish with fried food
Horrible bitch gets what’s coming to her
Have you tried not parking illegally?!
Diana Watch 2014: still ‘dead’
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