The news in brief:
News anchor has trouble keeping up with the Kardashians
Breaking news: no-one gives a shit about your rabbit
Medieval superstition claims another life
Man’s inhumanity to man continues apace
Business’s restructure unlikely to affect your life
Internet doesn’t understand how space works
The universe is dying, but only in that technical way
everyone over 20 is dying…
Nothing calms down a powder keg quite like armed vigilantes
Politician is full of shit
Pro tip: immigrants and refugees are NOT the same thing
Religion’s bodycount continues to mount
Looks like we’re going to have some weather
Study states the obvious: fresh eggs are best
Advert offends half the human race
Newspaper makes a pretty sweeping generalisation (men like
chocolate too)
Plastic balls will save us all
Ukraine
situation still hella scary
Artist grew a what on his what now?!
Hero dog saves the day
Diana Watch 2015: newspaper squeezes a second day out of the
same story. Still dead.
Nudes in brief: Kylie Jenner
And finally: two men bravely disarm a hostile situation and
save a whole bunch of lives…
Reading the news so you
don’t have to…
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