Today's news in brief:
Mindless hate engines basically interchangeable
Newspaper not at all unbiased
Hypocrisy HO!
Man's inhumanity to man continues apace
Politician steals lines from Captain America
Jobsworth goes a little overboard
Tragic death somehow all about you-know-who
Conservatives fight over the Matrix of Leadership
Happy birthday bikinis!
Skynet knows when you're talking shit
Playground probably not haunted
Pasta (currently) good for you
Religion’s bodycount continues to mount
Laws not actually retroactive
Jockey has a pretty shitty day
Hedgehog officer sounds like a pretty sweet gig
Hate group didn't do its research
Housing market remains ‘pretty shit’
Study states the obvious: too much food is bad for you
Stars in their bras: Katherine Heigl
And finally: professional cuddler sounds like an ideal job
Reading the news so you don't have to...
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