We're back, bitches! Once again our scheduled return coincides with another wave of bombings, stabbings and shootings around the world making us wonder how we can carry on poking fun at the news when the news is so full of darkness. At home we have disabled people living in fear of next week's budget, and across the pond a shit pile of people seem to have forgotten the lessons of the 1930s and 40s and are rallying around a trumpeting hate engine who promises greatness on the back of intolerance and fear.
This is a hard gig. Thank shitting crikey for celebrity gossip:
This week’s celebrity news in brief:
Man's weight loss is not news
Couple caught canoodling
Paparazzi intrudes on romantic moment
Woman wears dress
Woman conforms to media's narrow definition of beauty
Breaking news: woman doesn't do her hair and make-up when running errands
Man updates social media
Wild speculation about who's quaffing who
Sideboob is NOT news
Woman wears beachwear AT THE BEACH!?!?
Stop the press: family walks dog
Woman wears brightly coloured shoes
Woman drives car
Woman caught not wearing jewellery
We still think publishing pictures of other people's kids is weird and wrong…
Photographers intrude on family day out
Mother and daughter caught doing normal mother and daughter stuff
Stars in their bras: Chantelle Connelly
And finally: throwing amatures at a ski jump may have been a Very Bad Idea
Reading the news so you don’t have to...
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