The news in brief:
Nothing compares 2 Unsolicited advice
Fry ups cause babies
The Internet is full of porn and pictures of kittens
Diana Watch, day 25: still 'dead'
Religion's bodycount continues to mount
UK forgets about Syria, fracking and badger culls as lottery price doubles
Students are mucky pups
Newspaper says sorry
US government still closed, please leave any packages with Canada...
Driver overreacts to fairly minor event
Supermarket in bother for keeping security room locked
Pound shop sells useless tat
Sleep is bad for you
Family tragedy is apparently news now
Public outraged by sound medical advice
Woman wears dress
Family breakup is apparently our business now
Newspaper slams very talented singer for her clothes
Actors act in film
Reading the news so you don't have to...
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